How many times have you or someone you know been a victim of the following questions:
For a single woman: Why don’t you have a boyfriend?
For a woman with a boyfriend: When are you getting married?
For a married woman: Why haven’t you had children yet?
Sometimes, we forget to step back and to put ourselves into someone else’s shoes before we make judgments about their personal life. Actress Gabrielle Union’s latest book, We’re Going to Need More Wine, is a testament to how society can be a little too harsh on women at times.
In the book, Union reveals her attempts to have a baby with her husband Dwyane Wade, even going through years of IVF.
“I have had eight or nine miscarriages,” Union writes, adding, “For three years, my body has been a prisoner of trying to get pregnant—I’ve either been about to go into an IVF cycle, in the middle of an IVF cycle, or coming out of an IVF cycle.”
This is obviously something we wouldn’t have known if she didn’t open up about it. Union also reveals that like other women, she is still constantly asked whether she wants to have kids: “For so many women, and not just women in the spotlight, people feel very entitled to know, ‘Do you want kids?’ A lot of people, especially people that have fertility issues, just say ‘no’ because that’s a lot easier than being honest about whatever is actually going on. People mean so well, but they have no idea the harm or frustration it can cause.”
Her book is definitely an eye opener, especially since it is so easy to label other people. Gabrielle Union’s message is a reminder to everyone that a little empathy can go a long way.